we no dey drive off

Posted: August 28, 2011 in Uncategorized
Tags: , ,

The back door was open, breeze wafted in disturbing the newspaper,making the hairs on my leg tingle.
‘Eh,barrister,how was your week?’
My brother,I came so close this week’, he sighed. Then he proceeded to tell me how close he came to hitting the bull’s eye.He had a plot of land for sale,the fees that would have accrued to him if the deal sailed through was in millions of naira.After endless liasons with agents in which MTN was the sole profiteer,they managed to get buyer and seller at a consensus price.
‘I was already pricing LR3’ he said wistfully
Then on the day the deal was meant to sail through,the seller fell ill and was bedridden. But barrister pushed,all he needed was for the seller to make an appearance,even if na guest appearance.The seller looked at this eager upstart with pity and agreed on one condition,he would come to the point of sale but remain in the car-the riguours of coming out,walking,sitting and rising would be too much for his old bones.Barrister eagerly agreed and proceeded to hassle the buyer to agree to the terms of the guest appearance.The buyer shrugged.
So it went that on Tuesday,seller,buyer and barrister congregated at Alausa to verify documents and seal the deal.Barrister had decided in his heart of hearts to celebrate that day every year as his birthday for truly,a man doesn’t start Living until he has a certain amount.All went smoothly as the seller handed the original Certificate of Occupancy to Barrister and verification began.Just as they got to the last page of the deed,Mr. Buyer noticed a missing dot(.) in Mr. Seller’s signature.This is land worth hundreds of millions,Mr. Buyer wanted that verified, so Barrister took the C of O and sauntered to Mr. Seller’s car. ‘Just a tweak that would be rectified in a minute’,he thought.
‘Err sir, a fe pe Land Inspector,o ni nnkan ti o rhyme ni be’ Barrister told the sick Mr. Seller,bowing all the while.
Mr. Seller waved sickly to show assent.
Just an hour or more for the money to graze my palm’, Barrister thought.
As he walked back,he heard the sound of a revving engine and watched Mr. Seller’s car take off Formula One style,almost grazing the gate.It was a scam and Mr. Seller knew he would be uncovered once the verification call was made.
‘Kai,I never knew I could miss that bar. I came so close to making that money’ Barrister said,hissing.
We all come close it seems,I guess its to continue closing in and err..for the record,if you wanna do any land deal,Contact Sterling Homes(07084546149)..we no dey drive off*wide grin*

  1. toosin says:

    Nice one osis..would av said ur company should pay you for this,but wen the bar enta yu maa go benefit 🙂

  2. jemjem says:

    lmao…paid for ad by sterling homes…

  3. q says:

    i keep on gettin baffled at people who know d have fake land papers and would still have the guts 2 present it to buyer.

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